Birther Control: Got Obama by his Mom's Vagina

I have studied the birther movement for nearly a couple of minutes. And i waited until the second minute to get high.
Basically, i figured it out. Everyone's missed what's actually going on! Barack Obama is an American citizen. He really is. It's way more complicated than that!! The truth is that the guy you see on the screen tri weekly, that looks just like Obama, is not Obama! It's Dick fucking Cheney!
That's right ladies and gentleman, right now the man you know and want to love, President Barack Obama, is Dick Cheney, in disguise.
That's why he won't give up the birth certificate! Cheney don't got it! When Obama was being kidnapped, last second, the guy ate his own birth certificate and was like, "YEah! Now deal with that!"
Seriously, have you noticed how skinny Cheney is now? He had to lose the weight to appropriately play the part of Barack Obama. Not surprisingly, Carl Rove has studied the art of black face tirelessly as a hobby his entire life and has been applying Mr. Cheney's daily makeup since the beginning of his mischievous third term.
Think about it! Remember how Obama was going to end the Wars, and close that terrible prison where anyone can be stored without trial, indefinitely, while likely being tortured?
Well, then Cheney took over, and bailed out the banks, kept the wars going, started more wars, pretended to start shutting the prison down, but then just kept it going anyway. And all the while he has managed to avoid that pesky certificate.
Oh wait. This just in. Obama released his birth certificate. I guess he is who he says he is.
That's too bad. I really thought he was Cheney. I guess he's just a puppet of the big money that got him elected. Just like everybody else.

Dude! I remember those problems! I remember a guy who had the solutions too. Ahh well, at least he's an American. Done. Lets start from scratch! Talk all inspiring to me with sentimental music in the background, just like you used to baby!

Easter Fuck Egg Orgy

Happy Easter my agnostic fuckers. I did some research in the libraries of youtube about Easter. I found this video to be the most captivating and informative...but i can't remember what it's about. Something about sex...i think. I'm pretty sure. I think she was saying that like Easter was some sort of like Pagan fuck holiday, but i couldn't really concentrate for some reason, maybe i was distracted by all the pretty easter eggs and the cute bunnies. I'd better watch it again (watching currently).
Ok, so I watched it again, she definitely said something about some sex-orgy pagan goddess, I'm almost positive she did. Maybe my childhood christian baggage was getting in the way of me learning the truth, but i've tried to watch this video like, a lot, and i just keep thinking of giant easter eggs and fucking and I know she is delivering a truthful message, but i just can't seem to put my dick on it.
Anyway, whatever her message is (and again, i know it has something to do with fucking) i commend her and her 40,000 youtube views. Apparently lots of people are captivated by her...information...whatever it was. Again i know it had something to do with fucking. I think. Better watch it again.

UFO's have been IDENTIFIED!!!!

Greetings truthers!! I just got back from the Belly of the Beast, where i was whoring myself out for an art project called Doggie Woggie Poochie Woochies that the monsters over at Everything Is Terrible are trying to make happen in an effort to possibly save the world.
And not a moment too soon i might add.
Here is a video, showing all this crazy unexplained shit in the sky. The shit is so unexplainable, it lends itself to only one explanation. Extra dimensional beings.
Now, at first, they just play that crazy song from the crazy drug movie (plus tons of other movies, that line of strings is just the go-to tune for when you want to scare the pants off of folks) and then they show all these crazy lights in the sky, which are pretty and fun to look at no matter what you think they are. They could be nature, or aliens or experimental planes or HAARP or a huge hokes or maybe all the lights are camera hallucinations (I'm not sure if cameras can hallucinate, but they can drop acid, so I'm thinking maybe)
Then they play this clip of this guy who is crying and having a nervous breakdown on the air and claiming to have worked for Area 51. Now this dude sounds very much like someone with paranoia issues, who may or may not have gone off his meds and started maybe mixing fantasy with reality, and mixing booze with other drugs and wearing tin foil hats. Buuuut, that's just what he sounds like. I suppose if someone were working for area 51 and found out about all this scary shit and then had to go on the run to save his life from extra dimensional beings, well, he would probably sound like someone with a few screws loose. I would like to talk to maybe one of his family members to hear about if this guy maybe had a brief history with speed, and or delusional paranoid nightmares about aliens and area 51. Perhaps he started confusing his job at Wallmart with a job at area 51 which then caused him to get fired, which then caused him to really go off, you know really dive down into that rabbit hole everyone had been telling him to avoid at all costs. He does after all mention getting fired in his teary rant and it seems to me that if area 51 wanted someone dead, they wouldn't fire him first. If it were me, i would set him up for a promotion and then put a bullet in his temple. Sounds cold, i know, but in my line of work, you have to start putting yourself in the minds of the extra dimensional beings. And if i were one and wanted his secret kept, I'd tell him he was doing a great job and then dumb that fucker desert, right?
Anyway, this video is cool, and strange, and disturbing or at least pretty. Also, one more time, i want to type, extra dimensional beings. Fuck creatures from space. From now on, i only care about beings from other dimensions.
slick
over and out

Government still going strong!

Business as usual mufucka's. The empire stands strong, congress will continue to operate. I repeat, congress will continue to pretend they matter. Someone said, 38 billion then someone else 40 billion, and then 38 billion imaginary dollars was settled on. In celebration of our shitty government still operating and paying the people who work for them, I'm gonna late night post, Alex Jones on the View talking bout Char Sheen. Yes i mean Char. That's what i call him.

Government Shut Down!

The government is going to shut down. They claim to not have any money. But don't worry, congress will still get paid. Also, don't worry, we will keep bombing Libya (by the way, my new favorite phrase is Humanitarian Bombing). The troops won't come home. That sounds about right. We will stop paying them, then also strand them. At some point I'm sure we will collect and pawn off their uniforms and college education credits. Then we will send the naked soldiers off with rocks and sticks and tell them to just throw the rocks at little brown children and to just eat their fallen brethren should anyone get hungry. Old school mercenary style.
I guess the gov shut down in 94. Remember THE GREAT SHUT DOWN OF 1994!!!!? I don't. But i guess it happened.
This dude seems pretty credible and he thinks that this is it. World War III. The fall of the empire. War forever always. I'm not sure i agree, seems like this could just be political bullshit like a fake story or something. But again, i feel like i could talk to the vlogger below in a bar for hours just toasting each other and agreeing with each other about how the world is bullshit. And occasionally debating the difference between the Illuminati and The New World Order.
If everything does collapse, i suggest you load up on guns and bring your friends and form gangs like in Gangs of New York and The Warriors and Mad Max and The Road and don't forget your bulletproof vest and football shoulder pads. Looks like we got about 12 hours.
Goodluck at midnight.
If the internet ends as well, I won't see you. I will cease to exist without the internet. So just in case, may i wish you truth.

Also this guy's a bit of an art film director too!

San Francisco and Japan Warning Poem

In honor of national poetry month or whatever and my growing angst i will compose a poem today.
Ahem,(By the way, i apologize because this is offensive in so many ways)
Warning San Fran
Warning Japan
This guy thinks
Japan will sink
Oh and then
the land slide will send
a thousand foot tidal wave
toward all the west coast babes
Damn, i loved Japan
Damn, i loved San fran
And yeah i guess LA
was pretty Ok
Oh well, stupid HAARP
Soon my bunker will be covered in water and sharks
(again i apologize especially for that last line, it's really long, and doesn't really flow, but i notice that alot of Def Jam poetry is kind of like about breaking the rules you know, like ee cummings, fuck your conventions!)

Pentagon and a pooch

Pentagon bombers bad. Rescued pooch good.

Libya, Syria , then Iran

Now the plan is starting to get out. Libya. Then Syria. Then Iran. We officially live in Nazi Germany.
May the lack of God help us all.
Here's another Russian TV post as that's all i watch lately. It's real easy, you can't trust any American news station to talk about America. But you can trust Russia to talk shit about America. Just as well, if you want the real news about Russia, American news is probably the way to go. Well. No. If you want the news on Russia you probably wanna go to the BBC or Al Jazzera. American news is pretty much never the way to go. You'd probably be better off with some drunk/stoned dude's vlog (like mine).
Anyway, it's just like we always thought. Libya, Syria then Iran. That's what's next. If you are keeping score at home, that goes: Afghanistan, Iraq, Pakistan (yes CIA drones are still bombing Pakistan), Libya, Syria, and finally Iran.
When does it count as World War III? When do the nukes start flying?
The Nazis conquered France, Poland, Ethiopia, Belgium, The Netherlands, and Luxembourg (any other ones?)
Rome conquered Britain, Asia, Europe, and a little bit of Africa.
But see, the difference is the shadow. This time the western powers that be are trying to be all smooth about it, not calling it what it is. These arn't coups we are arranging and funding, and shooting for, these are "interventions." So maybe they will get away with it. Maybe American hegemony will go on and on forever.
The question is, will the internet have an effect? Not me of course. Nobody reads this. This is more about me typing it. But what I mean to ask is, now that Russian TV is an option, now that Americans have countless portals of information that are not controlled by the CIA, now that the truth is actually getting out about how the Military Industrial Complex operates, will it make a difference? Activists have been claiming for years, that transparency is the key. Bring their wrong doing into the light and they will no longer be able to operate. But will they? Does knowing about any of this change anything?
I'm not sure.
I see soldiers going to Iraq perfectly comfortable with the fact that they are just hired guns for Haliburton. I see a nation completely unfazed by another war. I see earthquake machines, and crazies and porno and christian fascism being mocked as if that helps eradicate the ignorance, as if we could laugh away the toxic-ally brainwashed. I see millions of idiots battling against gay marriage, i see millions of smart capable well meaning people battling for gay marriage, and all the while the moderates out there are expressionlessly getting married, and fifty percent of them getting divorced and I'm sitting here drinking cup after cup of coffee, and for the life of me i can't even remember what the fuck marriage is? What does it mean? What does it mean to have your love supported by an entity of war?
What does it mean to pay taxes on the income you earn from a job you don't like, and then have those taxes pay for a war you don't want? Isn't that slavery? But how can there be slavery if freedom doesn't exist? How many questions can i ask to no one before i start needing answers that don't exist?
How heavy can i get before i get self conscious and start joking?
Maybe I'm just kidding.
That's it. I was just joking with all those pseudo intellectual paradoxes.
I don't really give a fuck. There's nothing to give a fuck about.
I'm gonna go get stoned and drink in the Sun and wait for the wave to wash us all away, the long rolling tidal monster that haunts my dreams.
When i see it in the distance I'm going to dance away the last couple of minutes and then fuck my love as I'm carried off by the white water. As I'm weightless and breathless and finally free, my last dumb little thought will be something like, "what's the big deal?"

Oil

So, Gaddafi got mad, because despite the massive amounts of oil they sell, they are still broke. The people of Libya (with plenty of funds and nudging from the CIA and Saudi Arabia) are getting the idea that they are destitute entirely because of Gaddafi. Gaddafi is saying to his people, no you don't understand i have been getting bitch slapped by the West for forever. He's saying, it's not me, it's them.
Say what you will about the guy, but he's right. You think once we kill him, and a couple hundred thousand civilians, we are going to install some virtuous leader, who then nationalizes his countries oil, thus bringing the people of Libya out of squalor? Is anyone anymore so naive to think that we would spend billions and kill civilians in order to improve that quality of life of Libyan civilians?
I feel like the American public actually believe that you can save a country by bombing it. I'm surprised that we didn't try to nuke New Orleans in an effort to save it so many years ago.
SO much Goddamn violence, fucking end times mother fuckers. Makes me want to start a fucking stupid punk band.
Have the rich just got this?
Seems like it.
They literally have been doing the same shit for a century and it seems very likely that the rich white man will continue to confuse and mislead and kill the brown and black third world until every last drop of oil is sucked from the sand beneath their starving rotting feet.
You can't blame the rebels. They are starving and so when someone tells them it's Gaddafi's fault, they have to listen. At least they feel like they can go after him. Whereas when Gaddafi retorts, it's the fault of the West, what the fuck are a bunch of starving fifteen year old kids to do, arm up with a fucking AK and storm the white house? So the people are fucked either way, fighting a war they can't win and arn't meant to win, being used by the empire simply to replace their leader with one that will continue to stomp all over them. A leader that will keep them down and bow down to the west at the same time. A leader that will be tossed the bones and scraps of his broken country and told to just keep those assholes in their place.
And here i am blogging about it to the choir. Screaming into an empty bucket, in a locked closet, sound proofed and buried underground or launched into the vacuum of space where the sound of my voice doesn't even exist. A hospital of children is burning. 18 American veterans will kill themselves today and the day after and everyday until these wars stop, they seem to collectively be stuck on the number 18 as it is also the age in which their lives were taken and sacrificed for the sexual and material gain of an old white man they'll never know. The rebels will be lead into battles with their brothers and abandoned to die for nothing.
And at the same time an oil man is trying to decide if he should buy a Jet-boat or just another wave runner for his summer cabin. He will think about it for just a moment before purchasing both toys, satisfied with his decision.

Libya

Sometimes i just get baffled. Four wars. People who support the military don't like to think of what's going on in Libya as war. The proud patriots will say something like, "This is just rebel air support!" Civilians are already dying. Blown up little kids don't care if the bombs that fell on their hospital bed were dropped in an effort to take out some government, they don't care about the rebels, they don't care that the CIA with the help of Saudi Arabia fueled this fire, created unrest, armed these people, funded this conflict, then claimed to have nothing to do with it, and claimed that the only way to stop this violence is by sending in war planes to blow up the place. Dead kids don't give a shit about that shit.
The CIA has been doing this since the 1950's. When they want something from another country, first they try to bribe said leader. IF that doesn't work, they try to kill the leader. IF they can't kill him, then they go in, make it look like the country is going nuts with rebellion (which they fund and create) then they send in war planes and blow the whole place to hell. Then they step through the rubble and the bodies take all the oil and resources for free. The rebels, the civilians, who ever survives will in the end be left to clean up the mess and blamed for the whole ordeal.
But lets say you don't buy that shit. Let's say you haven't read anything on the CIA and you haven't heard of Chomsky or whatever and you honestly still think they are nice and cool. Let's say you think that America is really just honestly and nicely trying to help honest rebel forces fight the evil empire.
So who are we supporting then? Who are these rebels? What do they want? What do they support? Who is their leader? What sort of government are they planning on setting up? I'm not saying they are going to be way worse than the current regime, but why on earth are we willing to kill for this rogue group of street warriors? Unless of course we want to lead a coup and set up one of these warriors as our own little American puppet dude, who will rule over his people with an iron fist and keep them poor while living a robust American funded life of luxury and in exchange giving us all of their resources for free (because we won't have to pay the pesky little civilians! FUck em!)
During Vietnam, we had this little side project going in a little place called Cambodia. We decided, hey let's arm and fund and give air support to group of revolutionary's led by a guy named Saloth Sar (or maybe you know him better as Pol Pot) anyway, he and his group of merry rebels were fighting the powers that be, and we offered our help, and with our help he won and decided to cleanse the country and slaughtered 2.5 million people in death camps.
Is that what is going to happen to Libya? Probably not. Maybe. Most likely we will bomb the fuck out of them, leave them in a state of chaos, take control of their resources and do the same to Syria. Oh yeah, by the way, Syria is next.

if this is too political, and someone wants to hear something more creepy. Here is some weird shit on the subject.